Bittersweet..

I've found some old letters. Letters in my iPhone that make me feel nostalgic. It takes me back to the beginning of the year. I don't know what to make up of these letters. I used to read them, smile, and fall asleep. Now they keep me awake just thinking about them. I'm slowly finding my life harder to live. I don't see myself in 20 years nor in 5. I wake up expecting not to have a great day but a rather boring shitty day. Gina makes me smile at least. I've grown a little bit detached from the past week but slowly we've been seeing each other. I wish she could cheer me up more. I guess she should just talk to me often instead of me doing the talking. Shayna's texts message are slowly fading. Today she blew up my phone with a ton of meows. Made me smile in 6th period. She knows me too well yet we are still strangers. Grisel is not really helping either. The only girl I trust besides my gf is having the best time of her life. Great seeing her recover from how she was a month ago. I tried my best to cheer her up and it worked. Manfredo is still Manfredo. Always saying the world is going to shit and he is gonna join the army so nothing much has changed. Track cycling is getting scarier. I've been drinking heavily on the weekends. Nothing bad, only for my liver. 2011 was a changing year for me I guess. Leaving Midnight Ridazz, finding love, fighting depression and finally rebuilding myself. I guess I'll just try not to think about life now and get some rest.