A New Year

There's not much I can say about this lonely night. My parents have left and to a celebration in El Monte and I've taken the choice of staying home alone. 2011 has been a year of trying to find myself. Many lonesome nights just thinking of the same thing over and over. The year started with me on a bed, half drunk with one of my exes and tonight it ends with with me walking down Hollywood Boulevard, smoking a black and mild and with sirens around me. There is not much that I did this year besides gain a lot of enemies. I don't really hate or dislike people I just tend to avoid them. Don't see the point of wasting my human emotions on another human. My high school is a wasteland of teenage hormones going into action in the hallways and peer pressure trying to converge on many of the students I attend with. My household hasn't changed much. Everyday there is either an argument with my mother and I still avoid trying to make contact with my father. I've grown and addiction to alcohol and cigarettes. Even though I know I have to quit soon I still manage to find myself smoking every weekend. I don't plan a resolution for this upcoming year. Resolutions are for pussies that can't be honest with themselves. I don't even recall last year's resolution. I don't plan to change, that's for certain. What's the point of changing if I might not see the light of tomorrow. All I can say for now is fuck 2011 and fuck 2012. Bring on the new year and live your life like there is no tomorrow.

Joy Division

I've liked them for a good while but recently I began listening to them once again. Ironically, Ian Curtis killed himself out of depression. Thank god pills always help my ass out.

Quitting ain't easy.

Seriously. I need to quit smoking and drinking. It's slowly becoming a bad habit. It shows weakness. I'm becoming the person I don't want to become. I used to hate people that smoke and drink but I'm becoming that. Seriously, its fucking pathetic. I need to dedicate myself to track cycling and quit my bad habits before it gets worse and worse. In time I know I'll quit. Its fucking disgusting.

Last few weeks

Till the year is finally over. This Thursday is Nena's birthday. Last Saturday I got really drunk and managed to make it home somehow. This week I will be cutting down on that. FMLY Fest is just 2 weeks away so that's on my to-do list for sure. I still have tutoring on Geometry every damn Tuesday. I'm very glad that I don't have to see anyone from school for 3 weeks at least! I seriously want to end this year already!!!!!!

Same Old..

11 days into December. Christmas is close by and New Years is right afterwords. I've become obsessed with the word "Nostalgia". The word comes to my mind every single day. I try to use it ever day at school because for some reason I'm beginning to miss the past. I fight my demons every night and try to fight to live another day. My chest begins to hurt from time to time. I'm gaining weight. People are still ugly and I sometimes don't even want to go school. Friday night was All City Toy Ride. I saw some people that I used to call friends. I realized those idiots just act like the little pricks I see everyday at high school. If one doesn't like you then all of them don't. Seeing Chynna and Geo all busy for awhile made me want to help them. I sat in the front desk helping those that were donating toys and checking if people were on the RSVP list. At the corner of my eye I could see someone staring at me. One of the old MoM ridaz just dogging me. He would turn around talk with his pals and look back at me. Like if he wanted a fucking photograph. Good thing I left that damn group. With the exception of a few, most of them are just stuck being a fucking teenager. Especially the damn leader. Ever since Drooby left to Detroit the MoMz have died out. They look like some social club that doesn't really do anything besides look like a bunch of thugs at bicycle rides. I think if Drooby was still here everything would be better. He was the only one that always managed to motivate me to look at things in a different way instead of the fucked up reality we live in. Saturday was my mother's birthday. I went to go celebrate with my family and Evelyn Salgado at Tokyo Wako in Arcadia. It's basically like a Benihana. They celebrated and drank. On the way back home we talked about the past, our favorite things and she couldn't remember where she lived. I dropped her off and finally got home. Silently undressed and now I'm here writing only because I feel nostalgic.

~*LOS ANGELOPES*~

A short film Richie made of Los Angelopes 3 Years Anniversary.
Reminds me of the days when I would hang out with these guys non-stop