Smiles and Jealousy.

I had recently gone to the valley the past couple of weeks to visit a friend of mine. A girl older than me that I met at during a bicycle ride. The first time I went over we talked about her ex. She made me some food. We watched movies and ate ice cream. It felt really romantic although we weren't doing anything. I left but I felt like I should have told her that I liked her. The following week I visited her again. We made breakfast and watched another movie. She was really sleepy because she had stayed awake all night. During the movie I told her. "I like you". She responded "I like you too". I proceeded " No, I really really like you". There was silence and a smile. We turned off the movie. She wanted to sleep. She kept tossing and turning and so did I. She couldn't sleep. I looked at her and kissed her. We began kissing passionately. Shirts came off, so on and so forth. There was a moment though, where I felt something. We looked at each other sweating heavily and smiled. We didn't have nothing to laugh about but we did. Her freckles under the sun looked so beautiful. It was like I was staring down on a Greek Goddess, mesmerized by a curse of beauty. Afterwards, we slept for about an hour. We talked, her friends came over. I stayed in the room finishing the movie. It was kinda awkward. In the night we both had to leave. We took the metro home and were smiling like little kids the whole time. My stop was coming up. I asked her what was going to become of us but I got no response. We didn't know an answer so I told her to talk about it later on. I kissed her and I got off. I came home with an urge to say something. Like I actually felt feelings towards someone in my life again. We texted each other but the subject never came up. Two weeks later, I saw her with her ex-boyfriend. Some tall scrawny kid that kinda looks like me but with what my friend says, "una cara de pendejo". A little bit of jealousy stepped in but I didn't care. The tecate and cigarette was distracting me. She left with him and I stayed drinking but I had her in mind the whole time. Slowly, we kinda quit talking. For once in my life I feel used. I feel like there was nothing there for her but for me I felt a bond. I think it's karma for all the things I've done. Hopefully someday I'll find another her, but better.