Since it's our "Last Day"

Might as well add a little tune into the mix.
It's been a great year. Honestly, not much of the bad as happened. I've been spending my weekend with Santos, Eddie, Jen, Alf and many others. It's repetitive but always fun. I still look the same. Facial hair never really grows. I've become friends with people I didn't like but I've also had people that used to like me, grow a bitterness towards me. Good riddance. I got a new bicycle which I call the Swordfish II and I had Irony stolen. I got her back but she'll be returning with a fresh coat of paint thanks to Ulye. I got a decent job with my father's roofing company. 400 bucks in my savings account and a look on my face that says, "I have so much to look forward too"

  To the Midnight Ridazz that read this: I'll be honest to say I didn't enjoy much this year besides 99cent rides, BeastSide Mosey, Spoke N Art and Monday Night Rehab. The spirit still lives on tho. Funzie is great but the Skull must live on. To me the riders of the year has to be CamelToe Manalo, Rick (BSM) and The Commodore. They have been giving in a great amount of detail and work into the Beast Side Mosey. It reminds me of the old C.R.A.N.K. MOB. Great ride. Great people. More riders should make rides like these ones for when there are empty slots on the calendar.

 To the adults that have influenced me: Just many thanks. Especially to those I see on rides. Influence of the year has to go to, July Cardoza. One of the top dudes I enjoy kicking it with. Possibly old enough to be my father, this dude acts so young and positive towards everyone he meets, that I sometimes don't understand why people get on his bad side. Also would like to thank, John "Osnap" Clark, Alex Barrera, CamelToe Manalo, Albert Quiteno, Jae Marin, Big Gio also known as Cockaine Moonday, La Norma Herrera, Aktive, Detox, Byron, Spano, the NELA MoMz, fucking Troy Herrera, the rest of the Angelopes, and many more who have my life awesome. Many thanks.

 To my friends I kick it with (almost) every weekend: I fucking hate you guys and I think this is why we get along so well. We talk so much shit about each other's back it makes us great friends in general. Thanks to you assholes I've been stuck at the arcade playing that stupid Wangan Midnight Maximum Tune and that bummy ass pool hall. It better be like this in 2013 or I'll swear to God my life would be so fucking boring without you dickheads around. <3

 To the girls I messed around with: I'm not the father. You probably have an STD. YOLO. #OnceYouGoPalucha. (I don't have an STD. But....get yourself checked. Most of you are sluts anyways.)

 To those people that don't like me: I'll tell you this the nicest way possible. Eat a bag of dicks.

 Last but not least, the people who read this but I didn't mention: Thank you guys. Honestly, I love writing . It's a passion now since I have such a tiny fan-base  I might be taking be taking some writing classes in the future to improve myself but anyways, thank all of you so much.

  In conclusion, it's been a fascinating year. The world is probably not going to end but hey, might as well right this. Like most of your parents say, "Por las dudas." Many thanks once again to all of you. Have a beautiful December 21st, 2012. Chao.


p.s. (For those of you that get the joke) RITCHIEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!

Arcade Noir.

I walked out of the local arcade to a cold Los Angeles night only to find a young woman smoking at the outside patio. Light skinned, possibly in her early 20's with a lonesome look. Not lonesome enough to spend the night with a fool like me. With the cold breeze nothing felt better than a Lucky. Trying to find my lighter this young woman steps up. Her beautiful lips utter "Would you like a light?" I could only respond with a smile. As the lighter comes closer, she utters a few words. She escapes from her struggles at the arcade. The machines take away her worries from this city. She becomes engulfed with the beauty of technology just like I am engulfed by her mysticism. Zippo closes. No names are given. One last smile and her blue eyes shine under the moonlight's glow. She walks away and vanishes into the Los Angeles night...

The Carousel II

I've recently stepped out of being with someone. Typically I'd be bothered from being alone but my emotions towards other human beings has died down. I've quit caring about others and focused on myself. It's been like this for the past 2 years. I honestly don't know what love is anymore. I date someone and get tired of being with them. Sexual relations are not even worth anything to me. I don't enjoy feeling the warmth of anyone else. I've been going round and round, looking for that place in which I felt loved. I've been looking for someone who'd I'd enjoy going out with, I'd ride my bike with her, go look at art galleries with her, go to the arcade to play Midnight Maximum Tune with her, and be proud that I'd be in love with this woman. I had this at one point in my life, but I feel the outcome of that has made me become selfish and not care towards any woman I've come across. I should be alone. I've hurt too many in the past 2 years. They don't like to admit it but every woman has that glitter in their eyes when they find that someone special and I've seen that glitter go away...

Some old messages.

Now that Facebook has that small chat thing on the lower right hand side, I sometimes forget to check if someone has sent me a message. I clicked on the last message Grisel sent me just to make sure I didn't miss anything. I realized that she had either deactivated her Facebook because she finds it annoying or her overprotective boyfriend saw her talking to me and now he has forced her to block me. Regardless, I opened up our previous messages only to fall into an abyss of nostalgia. Messages from I was still barely getting to know this girl. So I went to other people I had conversations with only to realize how much different I've become with just a few years. Besides being an emotion wreck I was also an aspiring youngster (still am) barely getting into the world of bicycle riding. I found various messages from people that now have a bitter hatred towards me, letters from my exes and friends that have disappeared. I think it's genius how I can look back at the past to influence me now. I believe I have a lot to learn and in a few years I'll be looking back at the messages of today.

A Trip to the Other Side.

I'm not much of a drug user. Besides Vicodin or Ibuprofen for my knee, I typically don't resort to any type of drug. I've never enjoyed weed unless I have Dark Side of The Moon playing inside my house and I'm about to go to sleep. On Saturday, I was hanging out with a few friends who were making blunts and drinking. It was around 7 and it was a really boring Saturday. I was supposed to go to Spoke N Art but I didn't really care about it that much this time. After awhile, they put a movie on the projector. It was called "The 5000 Fingers of Dr. T"; some old Dr.Seuss flick from the 50's. A few of the blunts were being passed around so I was like, "Fuck it". Bad idea. Not being a chronic pot smoker, the drug took it's toll. I was so high, I couldn't move my neck to the point in which I thought it was going to snap off. My ears started ringing and after awhile, it felt like I fell into this pit of stars around me. I had lost recognition of where I was and who was next to me. Feeling sick to my stomach I closed my eyes. It was like being on that old acid trip. Losing control. Not knowing who you are. Out of a crack, I saw my friend's face. I told him "I feel sick". He asked me if I wanted water and of course I responded with a "yes". I saw him walk away and once again I fell into the daze. Noises. Flashing lights. The movie playing it's roller-skate dancing scenes. My friend came back with what appeared to be a massive jar of water. As soon as the first drop of water hit, I returned. I was just really high now. It was all good. I laid down in the floor. I checked my watch and it was 11. I began laughing and having a decent time. When the movie finished, I fell asleep. I woke up around 2, to find everyone else going to sleep. I was still high but good enough to go home. I grabbed my stuff and rolled on home. I was having time lapses but I was telling myself that I was good. I just had to get home. After a few red lights, stop signs and dark neighborhoods I was finally at square 1. I was glad to be in my bed, with my pillows and blanket. I learned a lesson. Never be under the influence when you don't feel comfortable. It will be a bad ride.

Patience.

"Oh, there'll be time to get by;
I get dry after the swimming pool.
Oh, there'll be time to just cry;
I wonder why it didn't work out.
Oh, there'll be time to fish fry
for letters by yours truly.
Yours truly."

Futbol.

5 minutes left in the game. I had joined a team in this league called AYSO, well my dad had put me in it. The coach had doubts about me. Didn't put me in till the last few minutes. Put on my fresh shirt. Number 11. Green. I was a midfielder ready to play my first game. I'm scared. I see kids beating each other for this ball. We were playing kids that were two or three years older than me. Being a 8 year old midfielder with a dad that has his whole life dedicated to the game of futbol put a lot of pressure on me. I have a knot in my throat. The ball comes flying from our goalies post. The opponents midfield is deep within our territory. The ball lands on my feet. I remember it looks like the newer balls they have now. Soft. They curve a lot. Look like I had more of a kickball in my possession. I look over to the sidelines and see the bench players staring at me. Everyone is screaming including my dad. I can hear him. "Corre cerote" is all I can distinguish. Lucky for him, he had a beer and a giant umbrella covering him under the hot Los Angeles weather. I turn around to see 2 defenders running towards me. I jump into this game. I feel this immense heat hit me harder. I manage to put the ball through the defender's legs. I run faster. I see the second defender. He looks dead. The heat has brought him down. Sweat dripping down his face. He tries to push me away from the ball. I preform my first step over. It wasn't that good but after seeing hours of the Brazilian futbol club players doing it thanks to my father I had an idea how to preform it. I'm alone with the goalie. I kick the ball. I feel a bit of my toe dig into the dirt. The ball goes into the corner of the goal post. I smile and start jumping for joy. My first goal in my first futbol game. I see my dad with a huge grin. I run toward the middle of the field celebrating like Ronaldo and wag my index finger. The opponents team serves the ball but the ref blows his whistle and the game is over. I'm happy as hell and my dad hugs me. The only time I've ever felt him being proud of me. I grab my stuff, say bye to my team mates and head home. We lose the game 1-11.

Summers Over

Everyday I wake up to the sound of the local elementary school bell, cars roaring through Normandie Ave, kids screaming and the garbageman. Although summer is over it's still hot as hell. I leave my house around 8 to continue my education. It's become a tradition to smoke a menthol and ride my bike to school. Irony. Night time riding is dying down. The Bike Angeles week sucked besides C.R.A.N.K.MAS. This weekend was at a standstill too. Nothing to do besides play Fallout 3 and I passed that in less than 24 hours. My horse head has arrived so has a Unicorn head that Big Boss decided to order for Halloween. Yeah, Summer is officially over.

The Indian Summer begins.

Today is the last day of Summer. 90 days of beaches filled with beautiful women, birds chirping, late night parties, reckless bicycle riding and the occasional 100 degree LA weather. I spent my summer with a lil bit of school and late night bicycle rides. Not only that, I've spent a shit load of time at the Bat Cave (Santos' casa) and out on the streets with Santos, Kevin, Eddie, Nena, and others. I reflect back to last summer and wonder why I was so stupid to hide myself from the liberties i had in the palm of my hands. I guess being all depressed took its toll. This year basically made up for everything last year. I spent a good day with my mom at Tour De Fat, something I couldn't do last year. I made a ton of new friends. I got in shape. I started working out and the past few weeks I've spent it with a beautiful womyn at my side. Hopefully next summer turns our to be even better. Goodnight.

My Second MNR.

Finally shaved my legs. Literally took me an hour. But it payed off today. Shaved legs and Lycra feel fucking awesome. Now I understand why the pros do it. I was supposed to go to Cyclones with Eddie, Santos, and George but George lagged it and we ended doing Monday Night Rehab. So you got 4 guys in full lycra at a chill paced ride. It was a fun ride. George got a flat but we fixed it but at the final stop I was told that there was a race. Now, having the team together I was like fuck yeah let's do this! The plan was to paceline all the way to the end. We headed to the start with the ride and it was about 50 or so people ready to race. I was honestly nervous. Having to do 6 miles fast as hell plus there were lights on the way. So everyone was ready. The moment was coming and I literally felt my legs begin to twitch. Osnap then counts us down and we are off. Literally, almost all of the ride took off. It was Santos, Me, George and Eddie. Santos and I riding road and Eddie and George riding fixed. We knew those who sprinted were fucked so we started off normal and then began the chase. The pack was getting cut from 50 to about 30 or less. I kept passing people like nothing. The kids on their fixed gears were winded besides the ones that rode in races and fast rides. Slowly we passed the middle pack and headed to the top. It was Nick and Ty leading it followed by George and some kids on their fixed gears that looked like they were dying. About a mile and a half in we encounter our first light. Ty screams out be careful and we run the red. A blue pickup truck comes flying from the right and nearly misses Ty by inches. I go around it and George had to take the Orange line busway in order to keep up and not lose track of us. The group was cut. I knew this was the moment to stay with the lead. It was now Nick and me leading the pack followed by Santos, Ty, Byron, Eddie, George (on the busway)  and a couple of others. The pack of 30 was down to about 10 of us, hauling ass down Chandler and leading the fast pack by about half a mile. George cuts in from the busway almost nailing Santos but we then began the paceline once more. I dropped back and let Ty and Nick lead. Now being 8 of us we slowly start coming back to the ride meetup. I do the stupidest shit ever. I begin to sprint early because I thought the end of the race was at the park and not the station. As soon as this happens Ty and Nick take off right behind me kinda like a slingshot. I was like damn in my head. I roll into the station with urge to cough but I was happy as hell. The fast packed ended up with only 8 of us.
1. Ty
2.Nick
3.Byron
4.Eddie
5.Santos
6.George
7.Me 8.
Guy with leader.
 6 miles in less than 10 minutes. What a fun ending.

On Ave 28 to Footies.

When I was 11 years old I had my first bicycle. It was given to me for Christmas by my mom's boss. I don't remember the brand but I remember it being a red mountain bike. The first time I got on it I was scared. Falling to the side. Loosing my balance. I slowly got the hang of it. I rode by myself for awhile. My apartment's parking lot was the only place I would be so I started riding there almost every single day. After awhile, my neighbors joined me. We would have small races. 10 laps. 15 laps. I learned how to bunny hop in less then a year. I once jammed my two feet in the front wheel thinking nothing would happen, and that became my first face-plant. That was 9 years ago. Riding on Ave 28 made me remember this. I sprinted through the green light with a sharp left turn like I used to in my parking lot. I felt the little kid in me smile.

Smiles and Jealousy.

I had recently gone to the valley the past couple of weeks to visit a friend of mine. A girl older than me that I met at during a bicycle ride. The first time I went over we talked about her ex. She made me some food. We watched movies and ate ice cream. It felt really romantic although we weren't doing anything. I left but I felt like I should have told her that I liked her. The following week I visited her again. We made breakfast and watched another movie. She was really sleepy because she had stayed awake all night. During the movie I told her. "I like you". She responded "I like you too". I proceeded " No, I really really like you". There was silence and a smile. We turned off the movie. She wanted to sleep. She kept tossing and turning and so did I. She couldn't sleep. I looked at her and kissed her. We began kissing passionately. Shirts came off, so on and so forth. There was a moment though, where I felt something. We looked at each other sweating heavily and smiled. We didn't have nothing to laugh about but we did. Her freckles under the sun looked so beautiful. It was like I was staring down on a Greek Goddess, mesmerized by a curse of beauty. Afterwards, we slept for about an hour. We talked, her friends came over. I stayed in the room finishing the movie. It was kinda awkward. In the night we both had to leave. We took the metro home and were smiling like little kids the whole time. My stop was coming up. I asked her what was going to become of us but I got no response. We didn't know an answer so I told her to talk about it later on. I kissed her and I got off. I came home with an urge to say something. Like I actually felt feelings towards someone in my life again. We texted each other but the subject never came up. Two weeks later, I saw her with her ex-boyfriend. Some tall scrawny kid that kinda looks like me but with what my friend says, "una cara de pendejo". A little bit of jealousy stepped in but I didn't care. The tecate and cigarette was distracting me. She left with him and I stayed drinking but I had her in mind the whole time. Slowly, we kinda quit talking. For once in my life I feel used. I feel like there was nothing there for her but for me I felt a bond. I think it's karma for all the things I've done. Hopefully someday I'll find another her, but better.

K.N.A.R.C. MOB

So last night I went to K.N.A.R.C. MOB with Santos. The meet spot turnout was kinda low. When the whole ride left they wanted us to split. The first stop was great. A lot of people showed up. Funny tho cause the RatPack group and I split and made a hustle ride to the next stop. The last two stops were the best. They had music and all but I was feeling a bit bummed out from Friday until Helin cheered me up. On the last stop, we had fire soccer and El Sonidito playing for a good while. Then we took off while the ride kept going. On the way back, I got into an argument with a driver because my bag hit his car but he eventually sped off. We ended up at El Pastor as usual. Got my 6 dollar burrito and called it a night.

Promenade.

Honestly it sucked. I've never felt so bummed out in my entire life. There was a party going on and I just felt kinda lonely. I had asked my date to go with me the day before with a letter. The dean even helped me out. Prom day arrives and I go to the buses that were going to take us to our extravagant yacht. I wait and wait for my date to arrive and when she actually does we didn't really say hi or something. She just told me "Hey I have to go look for such and such." She had to look for the scumbag that asked her to prom then decided to say no and act like a dick (from what I heard) towards her the following week. He decided he wanted to go all of a fucking sudden. Now, I wasn't mad or anything I was just like OK. Cool. She will probably sit on the bus with me or something. So I lined up to get checked and proceeded to get into the bus. She did sit next to me and we had fun and jokes till the yacht. We walked outside and she disappears. I already knew what she had done. I felt awkward.  I see everyone with their dates and I'm alone. The most awkward part was entering the boat alone. I sat with her friends and expected her to stop by and sit next to me but I guess not. I was alone and empty. Kinda dying inside. I ate without saying a word and sat quietly to myself. I felt like snapping but what's it worth? I got a text from her saying sorry but I responded "Whatevers". I went to the top deck and saw a great view of the marina. I danced with a friend and tried my best to enjoy the time. More awkwardness arrived when they wanted me to take pictures with her. She tried to talk to me and apologize but I was in a different mindset. The boat docked and we were leaving. I went to our bus but she didn't sit next to me. I was feeling very shitty by then. We arrived at school and I planned to go to the after party. We walked it there and didn't have to pay due to me pitching in for the booze. I drank and drank. Modelo's and Smirnoff. I chugged a little bit too much when I saw her there. I talked to Kimmy but she told me to keep my guard up. Jorge told me something that made a lot of sense. She's into guys that treat her like shit. She then proceeds to go up to me and poke my stomach saying "I thought you're sober". She didn't know that thanks to her I broke my sobriety. In a different universe, I would have punched her by now. Me being drunk and pissed wasn't a good mix. Kimmy just reminded me once again, "Guard up". I went on with my friends and didn't see her after that. 2 AM and the cops kicked us all out. The party was over. I walked to Tacos El Pastor drunk. Didn't feel like eating. We walked home and ran into Jeff, Darvin and Franchise. We thought they were gang members. I got home and took off everything and slept. I woke up and reflected upon what happened last night. It wasn't no typical dance. It was Prom. The most magnificent dance of the year. I wasn't bummed out based on the fact that things didn't go as planned but the fact that I wanted to be with her. I wanted so much but I didn't have it. I liked her. I considered her the most beautiful woman in the world at one point. Now she's just like every other girl in school. Damn.

500 days later...

damn.

Love is...

Man oh man I've never cried for a song till today...

Progression

Well January has been pretty fucking boring to be honest. I've managed to make the APEX academy and Leadership hate me. The school has made me delete my Facebook account due to me "cyber-bullying" people. To be honest, I find it ridiculous. I just called a girl stupid and expressed my opinions towards the dance. Fuck it I guess. In other news, my girlfriend has been having a shitty week. She started bleeding from her eyes and she collapsed yesterday walking to school. She was also in the ER during the day and I was stuck at school. I tried visiting but she wouldn't tell me. Nothing but progression this whole month.